Legacy- something passed down from a predecessor or ancestor

My grandmother passed away this weekend. It was not expected, but I don't know that death is ever anything you can prepare yourself for, nonetheless, she passed away in her sleep early Saturday morning. Reflective person that I am, I have spent some time these last couple days thinking about Grandma, looking at old pictures, and considering the legacy that she has given to me...


Strength- My Grandma raised 4 kids alone. She worked to take care of her family. I can't say I ever even heard her or my mom complain about the situation, Grandma just did what was needed. She was a woman of great strength.

Generosity- Grandma never had a lot of money, but she was always the first to give. Sometimes when you would get a card with a check in it, you had to wonder if she was giving you the very last pennies in her account. There was nothing of hers that she would not give. She was the one that sent Tori "sheepy" when she was first born. She was an extremely generous woman.

Love- Whether it was her children and grandchildren, her husband Ken, her scary German Shepherds named Thunder and Lightning (I was so afraid of them), or her home in New Hampshire (lovingly called "The Levings Lazy Acres")--Grandma loved these important things in her life with all her heart. I suppose her love is what drove her generosity and her strength.

That is a pretty amazing legacy to have been given. I didn't get to spend a lot of time with my Grandma, because she lived far away, but I am struck today at the impact that she has had on my life. I have seen these qualities of strength, generosity and love in my Grandma, and I see them in my mom and how she is living her life, and I hope someday my girls will say they saw them in me, so that in turn their children will hopefully see it in them and the legacy will live on.

Thank you Grandma...I will do my best to continue your legacy!

Chris Berman, a football analyst on ESPN, often says, "That's why they play the game". Meaning you can analyze and predict all you want on paper, but the only thing that really counts is what happens on the field. This weekend I had a plan--and let me tell you--it looked real good on paper, but then, well...we had to play the game.

The Plan on Paper: Jamie and I were going to Chicago for the day to join up with my co-workers at Anna Worner and Associates for a holiday gathering. We were having lunch at a nice steak house and then taking in some of the city (big cities are the best during the holidays). All the prep work had been done. Abby was watching the girls for the day--they were excited. My mom had bought me a new red sweater--I was excited. I had a holiday hospitality gift in a cute gift bag for my boss-which she may or may not have been excited about.

Game Day: Everything played out as it should at first...Abby came, I woke up early and sprunched my hair, we got to the airport, got some breakfast, boarded the plane- no problem. I started to feel a little queasy on the flight, but figured it was from the lack of sleep, so I just closed my eyes to get a little rest before we landed. Upon arrival at O'Hare, my stomach was still feeling pretty uneasy, so I made a quick stop in the restroom and hoped that would take care of it. As scheduled, a white stretch limo picked Jamie and I up, we stopped to pick up our friend Woody's wife at their hotel and then we were on our way to Anna's house. I was trying to have a conversation with Bethany, catching up on the kids and such, but suddenly I just did not feel well at all. We were about a block away from Anna's house-I laid down on the seat and told Jamie I thought I was going to throw up. I asked if he had a bag. He did not. I saw a bag of plastic cups and told him to dump the cups and give me that. He did. I vomited in the bag. Catastrophe avoided... except the bag had a hole in it. So its contents were now sliding down the leather seat that we were sitting on. I panicked and quickly grabbed my coat and put it on the seat to stop it from rushing right into Jamie and I. I had to vomit again. I saw my lovely gift. I dumped out the holiday candle and Christmas CD and vomited in the gift bag. We arrived at Anna's house. Now since we all work remotely out of our homes, I have only met her once for like 5 minutes or so when I first started working for her and she had never met Jamie. I exited the limo. There was vomit all over my lovely red sweater and in my lovely sprunched hair. The limo driver at least gave me some gum. Sweet Jamie cleaned out the back of the limo and was holding the gift bag of vomit in his hands. Not wanting that to be Anna's first impression of him he spotted her garbage can in the back and went to deposit the gift bag there. Funny thing, though, they were meeting in the back of the house and saw him rummaging through her garbage cans. Woody came out and Jamie told them the story. I entered the house-vomit and all. Anna was so gracious to let me take a shower and give me a toothbrush. I had an extra sweater for a picture we were going to take, so I put that on and then laid down in her family room while they had their meeting. Because I was feeling a little better, they changed the lunch reservation to the same restaurant, but in the suburbs, so I would have some more time to rest. The steak house was amazing. Everyone else enjoyed their filet mignons and fancy salads and soups, while I ate a plain chicken breast (very good, but plain) and some mashed potatoes. I think the waiter apologized to me when he served it. Anyway, we had a nice lunch and I was feeling a million times better, but a little worried, so I watched them enjoy chocolate espresso cake and cheesecake with fresh strawberries (my favorite). Instead of spending time downtown, we hit the mall in suburbia and then headed to the airport and headed home.
Oh, that I were exaggerating, but I am not exaggerating one detail...ask Jamie.

A special thanks to Anna, Woody, Bethany and Sarah for being sooooo understanding and accomodating. I am so very, very sorry. I am lucky to work with such great people! And a huge thank you to my amazing husband who continues to find new ways to show his love for me.

Today I was a super hero. I was also a villian, but I ended as a super hero, so that is the important part.

I am still adjusting to this all day school thing. Kindergarten was easy. Sign the folder- send them off. They were only there for 2 hours, they didn't go outside for recess, so if you forgot a hat or something--no biggie. A chilly bus ride is not that catastrophic. Enter this year...this is a whole new world. Homework, spelling tests, recess in the cold, and school lunches...this is serious business. Today was just one of those mornings I did not have my game face on.

At the beginning of the year I thought I was off the hook when it came to lunches. Tori and I read over the hot lunch offerings and every day but two the first month she was getting the lunch. And the amazing thing was she seemed to really like soggy french toast sticks and cafeteria macaroni and cheese. She only passed on shrimp poppers (ick!) and chicken patties (75% gristle, 25% some kind of chicken). Well, today I was running a little behind. We passed on riding the bus this morning to gain some extra time, but we still found ourselves rushing out the door, throwing on all the outdoor necessities as we went. As I loaded the Mace into the van, I knew in my head we had forgot to check lunch. But, knowing we were already cutting it close, I figured she could just eat the school lunch--no problemo. To my dismay, I came home and checked the calendar---Chicken patties--what are the chances. I could just imagine the horror in her face when Mr. Suzuki told her what the hot lunch was. I could hear her telling Mr. Suzuki that her mom had forgotten to pack her lunch. I imagined she reluctantly made her choice and was planning the lecture that I was going to receive when she exited the bus that afternoon.

Seriously, if it was anything besides chicken patties, I would have let it go. (well, maybe shrimp poppers) But chicken patties--my conscience would not let me. So, following an appointment that Macie, Isabelle and I had this morning we headed off to Super Target (cuz truth be told I had not been shopping this week, so I couldn't have made her a lunch anyway). We navigated through the aisles being sure to get those school lunchy things like drinkable yogurt and peanut butter and cheese crackers. I made my purchases and hurried back to Bloomington. I wasn't sure if her lunch was at 11:14 or 11:40. I honestly thought I had missed it. But I went straight to Washburn, weeded through my grocery bags to pack a perfect school lunch (well, minus the sweet message on the napkin) and hurried into the school. I signed in and got my visitor badge and walked quickly down to the lunchroom. I surveyed each table, looking for that precious face--hoping she was not already at recess. I recognized some of the first graders from her class last year, but not this year. I looked to the left where some children were getting their trays and preparing to go through the lunch line. I saw Mr. Suzuki--relief--I quickly scanned through her class and there, standing 4 people from the front of the line stood Tori- standing with her tray, picking up her chocolate milk and heading to the counter where the infamous chicken patties were being served. I ran over. She said "What are you doing here?" She smiled to see I was holding her lunch box. I told her she could get the hot lunch if she wanted, but she quickly took her lunch box and handed me her tray. With a thank you she continued on in her line looking completely relieved to be bypassing the chicken patties. Mr. Suzuki gave me a thumbs up (which confirmed to me that she was not happy this morning when she ordered her lunch). I smiled, blew her a kiss, and headed home. Da-da- dum....SUPER MOM! (hopefully she will forget that it was my fault in the first place).

p.s. I totally would have brought her McDonalds to really be the hero, but that is discouraged in the school handbook. =)

Jamie heard from someone recently that a journal served no good purpose if no one ever read it. I love to journal. It is therapeutic for me..and typically no one ever reads them, so I decided to randomly disperse some old thoughts amidst the current happenings of the Millers...

The Most Difficult Words (Sister's Journal- Summer 2006)
It amazes me how early children develop pride and anger--they seem so sweet and innocent as newborns, but you soon discover they really are born ornery. All this to say that your sister can be one of the hardest people to humble yourself to. Really, any family member, but we are in a sister's frame of mind so that is the dynamic that I am looking at. Tori and Isabelle are in a love/hate stage of their relationship. They really are the best of friends, but on any given day the sounds from their room would not support that statement, and Isabelle seems to be the one with the short fuse. So as my parents did with my sisters and I, the girls have to "make-up". At the beginning of this new stage in their relationship I would tell Isabelle to tell Tori "sorry" and she would go give Tori a hug. Initially I was pleased with this response thinking she is showing her sorrow and desire to restore the relationship (I know you are amazed at the deep thought I put into this process). Anyway, I soon discovered that Isabelle refused to speak the words "I'm sorry". (You may have caught on to this already, but I am free to have rose colored glasses on for some occasions when it come to the girls' behavior) She could not bring herself to speak the words! Why is that? It must be pride, or in the case of a family member, a sister, who you know so intimately, and you know their faults and somehow feel they don't deserve a sorry, because they too are "marred". Whatever the case, I realized this is an important lesson for Isabelle to learn now (partly because it is a struggle for me as an almost 30 year old--yikes!) So, we began the process of teaching Isabelle to speak the words "I'm sorry". We still are in process, but we are getting there. First she would cry and refuse to say it--never a fun game. But now, she will say it, but she asks to say it softly, so when she does say it, it is barely above a whisper. I pray someday they both will be humble enough to easily and loudly proclaim their sorrow to one another, realizing their sisters friendship is far more valuable than their pride.

We left being a princess to my experts...Tori and Isabelle wanted to be the same princesses they were last year.




And Mace was a chunky little dragon--we had a great Halloween!

Stay tuned....and in case you are wondering- I do not have too much time on my hands. =)

It is getting chilly here- the season of red noses has begun.

Sometimes you wonder as a mom if your children are understanding what you are trying to communicate to them or if it gets lost in the translation from adult language to child language. Last week my church community held a benefit concert for a domestic abuse organization called Cornerstone. My girls attended the concert and we talked about why our church was doing it and how they could help. They cleared out all the quarters in their banks to buy treats at the concert and support the cause. Well, today I got some insight into why Isabelle wasn't quite as eager to help....

We were cleaning their room (my least favorite task in the entire world) and she found a baby spoon--the one that you get when you try a sample at Cold Stone Creamery. So she said, "I didn't know that Heather worked at Cold Stone". I was a little confused, not an uncommon occurrence when I am having a conversation with Ronsi, so I probed further. I thought maybe she was talking about a friend from church and I am pretty sure she never worked at Cold Stone. But then Isabelle, seeing my confusion, said, "Mom, you know, for the concert...the girl said she was from Cold Stone." Ah Ha! the light comes on. Well, of course we would do a benefit concert for an ice cream store--have you seen the price of milk lately? God bless you- you makers of sweet cream ice cream with a peanut butter cup mix in..help is on the way!

Of all of life's many blessings, a child has to be one of the greatest. One year ago today my life was once again changed forever. Macie Virginia captured our hearts from her very first breath. She was named after Jamie's adopted grandmother, Virginia Grandstaff, who was affectionately called "Ginny" and was one of the sweetest most pleasant women that I have ever known. On several occasions during this first year of Macie's life, Jamie and I have commented that her name suits her and Ginny would just love her. Macie is so pleasant, so playful, so happy. She brings joy. She brings laughter. She brings me to a deeper sense of awe of God's creativity in designing each person so uniquely. She creates in me a greater love for my Heavenly Father who so richly poured out His blessing when He put her in our life. I was trying to think of something clever or funny to write about the Mace and all her funny ways, but the truth is nothing came except an overwhelming sense of thankfulness to God for her. Happy Birthday my precious, pleasant, pudgy =) Macie!

The Lord has done great things for us and we are filled with JOY! Psalm 126:3

"One a piece, no repeats"
Each new school year and new teacher means new games for the Millers. This one is great for "table time" after dinner or dead time in the car. It is way better than hearing those preciously annoying words "I spy with my little eye..." (just not a fan of I spy..I don't know why). So, "one a piece, no repeats"... Things you can put on your feet: I said shoes, Tori said socks, Isabelle said toe nail polish. We all win! Have to admit, I thought Isabelle would go down, but she went out of the box. Great game Mr. Suzuki--yay for great teachers!

HAPPY FALL!!!

So Jamie has been giving me a hard time that I would have nothing to say about our trip to Seattle. He took me there for our 10 year anniversary that we celebrated this past September 20th. The trip was amazing, the city is so fun, and the scenery is breathtaking. We saw the Buckeyes in Pike Market and then watched them woop up on Washington the next day. See, I have a lot to say about the city of Seattle. But what I have had a hard time finding words for is to somehow convey what it means to be Mrs. James Miller for 10 years. And I have nothing. I am speechless. Words can do no justice to describe 10 years of life with my best friend, my soulmate, my biggest fan, my life partner, the amazing father of my children, my source for all things Buckeye, my real life hero of faith. So all that I can come up with is part of a song that was sung on our wedding day...

At the end of a long day can't close my eyes
Watching you as the sun sets
As it slowly waves goodbye
It's times like these I thank the Lord for the life that we share
And everyday I spend with you is another Answered Prayer

Answered Prayer
When your heart touches mine
We've found a love only few ever find
And if life should end tomorrow
I leave a millionaire
'Cuz in my life I take with me a life of Answered Prayers

You have shown me the power of what love can do
I see glimpses of Heaven in your simple "I love you"
And every time I think of it- it almost seems unfair
For a girl like me to have so many answered prayers

I am a rich woman. I love you Babe!

On a beautiful fall day in Bloomington, another BYSC (Bloomington Youth Soccer Club) Kicker season begins. The Miller family ventures across the street and down the road a little to Lincoln Fields, our Sunday afternoon home. Two girls will grace the field this year, which means running from field to field being sure to catch as many precious moments as we can--I call this the "Divide and Conquer" method of parenting.

One girl is a Mite. She is the number 4. She sits quietly and watches her coach carefully as they wait to get their team and individual pictures taken. She is not scard. She follows her team in a single file line over to her game. She does not volunteer to be the first in--she sits on the sidelines with her team and quietly watches. When it is her turn she follows the coach on the field with a smile. He places her on defense and she listens attentively as her teammate explains her role. The game begins and regardless of what coaches say the kids swarm to the ball--tripping over each other all along the way. But not this girl. She watches, and runs after the ball, but not too close--no need to get involved or wrapped up in the big huddle of kids. She kicks the ball when it comes to her--a soft kick--and then looks at her coach and her parents to see their looks of affirmation. She doesn't care what the score is. She heads off to play with her new best friend--squealing and running in the grass as her sister plays her game. High five from coach--smile from mom and dad and all is as it should be in this little girl's world. She takes a sip from her monkey water bottle and walks with mom home.

The other girl is a Duck. She practices her "skills" as she waits for her coach to come. She is the number 1. She sits quietly and watches her teammates as they wait to get their pictures taken. She is not scared. She dribbles over to her practice and volunteers to be "it" in a warm-up game of freeze tag. Her game begins and she is wherever the ball is--bull dozing through piles, falling down and hopping back up. She is sweating. She asks if her sister "won" her game. She keeps track of the score of her game in her mind. The game is over and she gets her snack. She heads off with the boys to play some more on an open field. Good-bye from friends and a thanks to her coaches and all is as it should be in this little girl's world. She takes a sip of her Powerade and races home.

The last girl rides down to the field. She stuffs her face with Teddy Grahams as I try to get everyone situated with their new team--taking pictures to capture the moments. She sits until she has had enough and then she chases the ball in the grass--probably eating random things that she finds as she plays. She does not watch any of the games. She takes turns in mom and dad's arms and all is as it should be in this little girl's world. She gulps down her bottle and rides home.

I imagine most of you could easily pick out which girl was which. Jamie and I have been so blessed with three unique and beautiful girls. It is on days like this that we are reminded how very different our girls are, but how each one brings a special part to our family that we would be incomplete without.

And she is off....

Not quite as bad as last year. She woke up at 7:00 instead of 6 something. Jamie made her pancakes and she was ready to walk down to the bus at 7:30 (the bus does not come until 8:05). I successfully stalled her until 7:50 and then we headed down. Last night she was nervous--this morning she was excited.





I think she is the cutest first grader for sure!!!!!


















Ronsi took it harder than anyone this year. She was being silly and playing at the bus stop, but as soon as Tori turned to head for the bus Isabelle's countenance changed and she started to cry (that is an unposed picture--that is Isabelle's sad face...pathetic, isn't it?). It is going to be a long day without Tori.

I remember the feeling...I was terrified. I was going into the fourth grade and the lists came out and I had a boy teacher--Mr. Voelker. I did not think that was going to be a good thing at all. But he ended up being a great teacher. He would take us out to play kick ball and we had S.Q.U.I.R.T. (Super Quiet Uninterrupted Reading Time). Aaaaahhhhhh....good times. So, tonight we went to the Washburn Family Picnic to meet Tori's first grade teacher--and you guessed it--Tori got the boy. Five first grade teachers, four girls and one boy, and she got Mr. Suzuki. I think my stomach dropped just like when I was going to be a fourth grader. I kept looking at her face to see if she was okay. She is very shy at these things,(yes, Tori is shy sometimes) which just kills me, but she seemed to be okay. I think she was handling it better than me. Tori never ceases to amaze me. Anyway, she has one girl in her class from last year and one boy from her soccer team, so that is nice. She put her name card (she decided to go by Victoria this year) on her desk and told Mr. Kazuki (as she calls him) that she would see him on Tuesday. First grade, here she comes....I don't know if I am ready for this.

We visited "not-such-a hot spot" Historic Murphy's Landing. The girls found it mildly entertaining. Jamie did not. =) We once again had a visitor for our adventure. Dan Occhiogrosso came with us. He is a good friend of our family and has been a big encouragement in our journey with Consumed. The girls really, really liked him (okay, not Macie so much, but she warmed up to him). Isabelle took a picture of him in her new cell phone, so she would not miss him (I think she knows it is not a real phone, but we are talking about Ponsi).








School starts in 6 days and counting!!!!

My personal title for the summer was "Summer in the Cities". I intended on exploring some of what our new city/state has to offer. And I was not disappointed. We revisited some of our favorite spots like Stillwater, Chutes and Ladders, the Minnesota Lynx games, and the Como Zoo. We found some new things like Como Town, the Science Museum, and the Edinborough Indoor Park. I still have plans to visit Historic Murphy's Landing and the Minnesota Landscape Arboretum before school starts in a week and a half. And there are many more places to explore I am sure, but the greatest thing I have enjoyed about "Summer in the Cities" is the people I have shared it with. Como Zoo and Como Town were fun because Michelle came with us and sat in the heat to watch the Sparky the Sea Lion Show and then conceded to ride the bumper cars twice in a row just after she ate. And Stillwater was great because we went with Jamie's sister and her family who we don't get to see very often because they live in Ohio. The Science Museum was fun because Marissa came along and tried to teach the girls (who are a little impatient) some science. Edinborough Park was fun because Katie came and climbed to the top of Adventure peak through all the ropes and obstacles only to go down a slide that didn't take us all the way down so we had to go through more obstacles to finally go down another slide that would take us even further down until we finally reached the bottom. And the Minnesota Lynx games are great because we see Silly Amber, the "other Amber", Nicole and whoever else of our friends is there that night. I suppose that will be true of anywhere that you go--there will always be things to see, but it is who you see that makes it special. I am so thankful God moved us to Minnesota for many reasons, but especially for the people, because they are what make it home.

I meant to post these before. This is my soccer star this summer. She played really hard and found that she could sweat so much her clothes would actually get wet (I know kind of gross, but she thought it was cool). Her team was the Eagles. And the boy in the picture, well, that is her dreamweaver- Sam. Yeah, nice.

Sweet Nostalgia...

The girls love to go to Ohio and hear the stories of when daddy was a little boy. The Millers have been in the same house since their oldest daughter was born, so it is full of memories and stories to tell of Jamie's childhood. But my family has lived in a couple of locations when I was growing up and now live in a house that I never actually lived in (believe me-- I am not complaining...the new house has a pool!) and I tease my mom that she doesn't really remember much about us as babies or little kids except that we were angelic (again not complaining--I was an ANGEL- that is all you need to know). But no matter how much the scenery changes there are certain things that are still the same and evoke in me warm fuzzies of my yesterdays. So this visit the girls got to experience some of these things...First, Granny's Sweet Freeze shop where I first fell in love with the cherry dip cone....mmmm...yummy! And second the playground I used to play on at Altoona Elementary. They have redone the playground and added all the fancy new equipment, but they transferred the old slide and the swings. So, I had Tori and Isabelle slide down the same slick metal slide that I slid down when I was a little girl. I know amazing stuff. I'm from Iowa- we enjoy the simple things of life.

Slate Run Historical Farm is one of my favorite places to visit in Ohio. I have gone every summer for the past three years with my girls, my mother-in-law, my sister-in-law Katie and whatever random cousins (of the 13 miller grandchildren) that are available. I fully intend on making it an annual tradition. This year Jamie was able to come and as you can see took his turn on the stilts. I love it because it is simple, educational, a good picture spot, FREE, but most of all a precious memory that I hope my girls will take with them forever.